Drunk on Geek

If Warner Bros. & DC want someone to just come in an execute a vision they already have for this Batman movie causing so much trouble then I am more than happy to do the job. I can probably dig around and find some old VHS tapes of stop-motion short films I made with Batman figurines when I was 13. My favorite is the Batman/E.T. the extra-terrestrial team-up to take down my little brother’s Power Rangers after they went rogue. And if Affleck wants out of the role that’s fine too. I’ll just hit up my boy Jake Gyllenhaal and convince him to finally make the jump into the Superhero game. He was very nearly a replacement Spiderman and was on the short list when Christian Bale got the role in Batman Begins. Part of me wishes there is an alternate universe where Jake did play Bruce Wayne/Batman in Chris Nolan’s Dark Knight trilogy and Christian Bale still makes everything else he’s already appeared in except he doesn’t take the John Connor role in Terminator: Salvation and somehow that piece of shit just never gets made. Maybe Christian Bale ends playing Lex Luthor in that alternate universe’s DCEU instead of Jesse Eisenberg. And it’s connected to the Nolanverse directly, so Gyllenhaal is still playing Batman. And Snyder doesn’t have Supes kill Zod in MoS so we get a fucking incredible team-up of Michael Shannon’s Zod and Christian Bale’s Luthor in BvS. No Doomsday needed. Find a smarter way to intro Wonder Woman and have her play a pivotal role in the final showdown by not just kicking ass, but slapping around Bruce & Clark to make sure they are fighting the real bad guys. Then the DC holy trinity lays the smack down on a very formidable Zod & Luther. Hello. Are you there? Warner Bros. and DC why haven’t you hired me yet?